I don’t know if it’s persistence or something else, but I seem to have an easier, clearer time/vision of Haisuith & Saiyûnor, etc. Practice? Acclimation?
In part, Spring is making me manic, but this is also Spring with Glamour and magic you haven’t had previously. Beltane is this eve. But I am manic and fey and buzzed with magic and the Call. But I think part of the point, the trick, is to ride that mania—the body reaction is partly throwing you, getting you over-excited, so you stress and fall into mania and not—whatever you need. (This is where normal fae would dance and drink and feast and fuck until high into the magic and then ride the wave until spent.) But you can relax into this, hone your senses and magic—that you’re feeling this says a lot—but channel this, internalize & rise.
I feel like there’s a –“switch” in my head or in the world or Saiyûnor, and flipping that switch, I’d shift There. But there’s also that seidr isn’t “meditation” in the normal sense—it’s a surrender to and simultaneous—male magic, galdr-like things shout patterns and decisions into/onto the world. I think seidr, you sense but also change things by joining it. You join with it (the world, another being) and then change both of you—adsorption and absorption.
I’m also a bit chilly.