I incanted at the tracks to act as a passage into Haisuith today, crossing with an invocation to Dana, Morrigan, and Hekate of the Paths, moving into Haisuith. I also affirmed my faerie nature and have tried to channel as I was able. It’s kinda awesome to know Dana-Morrigan is my mother—as I continue the family relationship with her. Sometimes the mundane bits of my brain try to assert some confusion about that … relationship, but I’m dealing with the goddess, not my “mum.”
Last night, She wanted me to do something with [locale], but I’ve been more interested in the Wood, and I don’t want to be indoors. During ritual, I found myself more in line as myself-Mabon-Belenus (?), which was cool, but I feel a bit newb (duh) as such.
Elethis is a titanic, renewing source of elthil and the Green—taking Earth, Water, & Sun—all three worlds of Land, Sea, and Sky—day-green produced from the sun and so on at night. It’s the elthil source I could hope for—
I’ve been experiencing a fundamental shift in self-image and even RSI—and I think that shift may have potential weirdness after a point—but I—like—the wings, that RSI—that RSI and Presence shifts at times—more or less fey vs. “sidhe” etc.—Now, if I can relax into this—
I can perceive myself as my own coil of elthil—day-green at the moment. That strikes me as heartening.
Kriya—spontaneous ecstatic movement (yogic?)
She spreads her dark wings and looks to me to join her in skies and trees, to gaze the earth from higher vantage, to spy the world clear and bright—she invites me as a lover to fly by her side; she encourages me as mother spurs her child to wing—
And outside I see her flying in the sky before Elethis
“World of duality”—always seeing binaries, is or not, never triune or something more poesical
Dunn posits thinking of sound as “a sort of intelligence with which you are trying to communicate.”
It’s interesting that I identified Mabon as my “Pure One” and grew into my present relationship & understanding with Dana-Morrigan.
It felt very crowded last night during ritual, for I seemed to get presences from everyone—I actually “extended” the ritual space in the Dream, which elicited an “about time” from some one.
My wings have been in force today—
The flesh beast/demons’ shredding of my wings, the repeated injuries to my shoulder chakras—seems a very deliberate, persistent attempt to limit and constrain and diminish me.
And my present reality defies my (mis)conception about where I would be.
[Mudra] This “mudra” resembles throwing the horns—traditionally a kind of “apotropaic” (protective) charm. However, I use it as a mudra, but it has Buddhic associations.
Dunn [in Magic, Power, Language, Symbol] is a c.m. who has gone a bit CM native, but he remains a Platonist who uses symbolic tricks to mediate his subconscious and the “higher worlds.” He leaves the final results ultimately to the “Deep Mind” and advocates a linguistic veil on CM’s psychological paradigm. He has a notion of “bridging,” but he hasn’t connected to the experiential realities. [I’m rather critical of what he does in M, P, L, S.]
Dana-Morrigan wants me to fly, wants to soar with me—and I want to join her.