My tooth is bothering me, making me tense jaw, neck, shoulder, so I’ve been distracted of late. Ritual breathing is problematic to some degree. But I tried to meditate in the glade and Haven last night and early this morning. […] I must, want to master my feelings, that part of what I’m facing is shame, and I should (and want) to confront that shame and fear, reclaim myself. And She’s right, but I get distracted by dental (and financial) anxieties, as well.
Stepping outside to work, crossing the threshold, an owl was quite noticeable—hooting—and my mind went to Athene. ________ says Athene is legendary for not giving a shit about modern gender norms, which makes sense given her origins.
The Worlds can react to your fears and worries and if you read as belonging. They do not welcome the “human-hearted”: the trepidation, anxiety, fear, unconfident. Makes me think of Dale in the Black Lodge: he thinks he’s fine until he confronts real shit (B.O.B.) and his courage turns to fear. A fey, Otherworldly heart, relaxed, confidence, self-possession. Me fretting about things brings halthaya into the Dream, and it responds to excise and chase you off. Or, halthaya manifests and chases you out of the Dream.
How did Thorn define “fey”? Hell, Thorn talks about warrior heart, and Ravenna embraces heroic warrior spirituality. Ravenna studied Feri for half her life & is friends with Thorn.
As I feel—“it”—myself, my body, my Presence, my—well, I feel fey and ecstatic and centered and shadowed.
The Pearl Pentacle brings the core of the Iron home to the goal, or a goal: Sex->Love, Pride->Law, Self->Knowledge, Power->Liberty, Passion->Wisdom.
I have more to learn and embrace with Athene. The Morrigan and Angus are Mother and Father, but I suspect I’ve also been devotee of Athene for a while. She may like my mind, I can hope.
I’ve seen an academic notion that clouds were seen as “branches” of Yggdrasil, with the Four Harts the winds that “ate” at the branches. The cloud association makes me wonder about my sight of Elethis with some cloud cover. However, part of that Hart mythology may be medieval Icelandic poetics added to give North myth analogous features to the classical.
I have defixioned for health, given the muscle and mouth issues.